Wal-Mart cashiers are pretty much as good as cheap therapists. Every so often you unload on them, and you feel so much better afterwards! Having worked as a Wal-Mart cashier on the night shift before, Ive been on both ends of this exchange many times.
Last night, I had occasion to visit my local 24-hour Wal-Mart at roughly 1:00 AM with it being 6 degrees F outside, and checked out with Alka Seltzer, Visine, kitten milk replacement formula, a radiator filter and a case of beer:
Cashier: So, got a boyfriend with the flu or something?
Me: No
T_T
Cashier: Then why else are you out in the middle of the night?
Me: *deep breath* I have swine flu and Im out of medicine, my cat has an infected eye and hes anorexic so I have to force feed him formula to keep up his weight, its six degrees outside and my radiator filter just caught fire so I need a new one so I can turn the heat back on in my apartment without burning the dump down and I have three, count em, THREE, finals on Wednesday so I need some booze or Im going to have an emotional breakdown.
Cashier:
Fuck your life, man.
Me: Fuck my life indeed.
I am currently involved in a contracted long-term graphic novel project, which means I am absolutely unavailable for commissions, trades, or any other job offers. Please check back later!